trauma – Expression of my life

Attachment to Broken Men: The bad boy

but these moments with him opened my eyes to my own behavior changes and traumas. He showed me how deep the forced teaching I received on how to be a “good girl” ran. The bad boy gave me the first real glimpse I would have a life-long problem I would have.

Worthy

I can sit here and beg you to love me. I can beg for you to give me a fraction of the love you give even your own phone. But it is useless. My only value comes from accomplishments you can steal from me. I was not worthy as a child and I know I will never be.

Attachment to Broken Men: Struggling to Survive.

I was hoping that maybe posting it somewhere makes the burning desire to scream it at the top of my lungs dissipate. I had mentioned before that I was engaged. Engaged to a man who, at the time, I believed was the best I could do. The absolute best. To me, he was everything I needed. Every time we fought, I “knew” it was because of me. I “knew” that if I were only better, more obedient, then the fights would cease. The mental and physical pain would stop.